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Excerpt from Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur Survival Kit

Questions or comments? E-mail the author,
Shimon Apisdorf, at ShimonA@mail.idt.net.


INTRODUCTION

So Much to Do, So Little Time

A few years ago a Canadian radio station aired a documentary series that looked at early twentieth century inventions touted as products that would "change your life." There is no doubt that the last one hundred years have been replete with products and inventions that have indeed altered the way we live. It's hard to imagine what life would be like without disposable plastic wraps, containers and bottles—can you believe that milk once came in a glass bottle? From telephones to fax machines and then to e-mail—who knows what's next? Maybe "Beam me up, Scotty" is just around the corner.

There is one part of that documentary that still stays with me: It's the piece about early advertisements for the first sewing machines. It seems that the assumption underlying the content and tone of those ads was, what will women do with all the free time they will now have on their hands? It was clear that the sewing machine would usher in an era of leisure totally unprecedented in the history of mankind.

The irony, of course, is that with the plethora of devices and services designed to save us time and increase our efficiency, we seem to have less time and be more harried than ever before. It's a catch-22, of sorts. The more time we have, the more we can do, and the more we can do, the more time we need. Hence, we try to fill every hour saved by our PC with two hours of other work or fun (mostly work), thus pushing us to discover ways to create another additional hour of time to accommodate the increased load. This deadly cycle soon spawns a new generation of time-saving inventions, which are again followed by more activities to fill the new empty spaces. The result is that what once took a week now takes a day and what once took a month or more, is now only a week's work.

Are you still puzzled at the fact that we are a society running on empty? We are forever burning ourselves out trying to manage our time and compress many years worth of activities into just one twelve-month slot. Eventually, something has to give.

Judaism: Caught in the Squeeze

There exists today an intense competition over who and what will fill the ever-shrinking discretionary time in our schedules. Where once Judaism was printed in strong, bold letters across our calendars, today it is lucky to get "penciled in" for even a few days in the entire year.

If Judaism were a corporation, I would assert that it has done a miserable job of marketing itself to the sophisticated, discerning consumer of the last half of the twentieth century. It is my contention, however, that the issue is one of marketing and packaging, not one of product quality. This doesn't mean that Judaism should suddenly take to the airwaves with a slick Madison Avenue ad campaign (although it's a thought), but rather that we should look at the medium through which the message of Judaism has been communicated these last several decades and see if we can't understand the problems and offer a solution.

Just Do It and Don't Ask Questions

The dominant medium for communicating Judaism to this generation has been the synagogue or community Hebrew schools. Whatever Jewish education most Jews possess today came from those after-school or Sunday morning classes that we all swore we would never subject our children to. Another medium was our parents or grandparents. While no one can dispute that their hearts were deeply rooted in the right place, the fact remains that even the deepest of sentiments in no way readied them for the task of articulating Jewish values in a relevant and cogent manner. More often than not, their fallback position was, "We do it because we're Jewish and that's just the way it is." And for better or worse, such an argument no longer carries the weight it once did.

We find ourselves in a bewildering world. We want to make sense of what we see around us and to ask: What is the nature of the universe? Where is our place in it and where did it and we come from? Why is it the way it is? Up to now, most scientists have been too occupied with the development of new theories that describe what the universe is to ask the question why.

-Stephen W. Hawking, A Brief History Of Time

The same, I believe, can be said about Judaism today. As educated adults who happen to be Jewish, we tend to look at our religious heritage and find it to be rather bewildering. We would like to make sense of it, to find for ourselves a place within it, but we just aren't sure what to make of the whole thing.

To a degree, the quandary of Jewish identity also stems from a prominent focus on the what and how of Jewish life at the expense of the why. A great problem is that Jewish education has stressed the mechanics of Judaism (the what and the how) and has neglected the reasons, meaning and spiritual ideas behind Jewish practice (the why). In a world where people carefully consider which activities will fill their time, you had better give them a darn good reason for choosing High Holiday services over the World Series, or quite frankly, you don't stand a chance! Of course, there is always good old-fashioned Jewish guilt. But it would be tragic if the Jewish people; the people who gave the world monotheism and the universal dream of, Nation shall not lift up sword against nation, were left with nothing to appeal to other than the specter of callously bruising the tender feelings of an aging parent or grandparent. Surely there is something that can sustain us other than guilt.

The Why of Being Jewish

The Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur Survival Kit is just the tip of an iceberg. Its purpose is to demonstrate that Judaism has nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to the superior quality of its intellectual and spiritual content. The Survival Kit assumes that if people were to possess a mature understanding of what Judaism has to say to our lives today, then it would easily hold its own in the fiercely competitive environment in which we live.

As I alluded to earlier, every aspect of Jewish life consists of three primary components. These are what, how and why. Let's take Passover as an example. What do you do on Passover? You make a seder. How do you make a seder? You get a box or two of matzo, some wine, a few Maxwell House haggadahs; you shlepp your family to the table; and presto, a seder! Then comes the issue of why. Why do we do all these things at seder? Why four cups of wine and not five? Why do we recline and so on?

Isn't it obvious that if we never meaningfully address the question of why, then eventually our Judaism will become a hollow sentimental ritual at best, a dreary burden at worst? In Jewish law it is considered torture to have someone perform a purposeless task. To carry out a mindless function with no comprehension of the purpose it fulfills is fine if you are dealing with automatons. For Jews, as for all people, it is ultimately debasing and inspires either total lethargy or violent revolution. The Jewish community today is confronted with both of these responses on a massive scale.

The Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur Survival Kit is a partial attempt to address the issue of why, within the context of the High Holiday services. According to the most recent statistics, the majority of Jews today no longer have any synagogue affiliation whatsoever. In fact, so many young Jewish parents are disillusioned with Judaism that over half-a-million Jewish children are being raised with either no religion or with a religion other than Judaism. I would be surprised if more than 40 percent of Jews in America attend Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur services anymore. I would be even more surprised if more than 20 percent of those who do attend don't start looking for the exit shortly after their arrival. How can a day in synagogue possibly be meaningful or inspiring if you don't understand the meaning behind the prayers you are reciting or the concepts upon which the holiday is based?

This book has been written for three types of people. Firstly, it is for people who have given-up on formalized Judaism and who are not planning to attend synagogue this year. If this is you, then I want to make the following promise: This book will give you a radically different understanding of Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur and perhaps your entire Jewish identity. Read this book—I dare you—and you will find that there just might be a side to Judaism, and even to synagogue, that you can learn to enjoy and look forward to.

Secondly, if you are planning to attend services but are dreading the experience, then again, this book has been written for you. What's more, I would suggest you read it twice. Once during the weeks before Rosh Hashanah and again during the services themselves.

Lastly, if you are among those who already have some sense of the meaning of these holidays, then I think that you—perhaps more than anyone else—will find the Survival Kit to be a worthwhile intellectual and spiritual supplement to your experience in synagogue this year.

Wishing you a Shana Tova, a sweet new year.

Shimon Apisdorf
ShimonA@mail.idt.net




PROLOGUE: WHAT'S A HOLIDAY?

Two Views of Time

Classically, there are two models for viewing time: one linear and one cyclical. The linear view imagines time to be an infinitely long line with three component parts—past, present, and future. Today we stand in the present and if we but peer over our shoulder we will behold a long line of time stretching back deeper and deeper into the murky realm of the past. The future is simply the continuation of this same line waiting to progress endlessly ahead of us.

The cyclical notion of time conjures up a different image. In this model we keep going around and around in circles forever wearing a deeper rut in the same track. With specific regard to Jewish holidays, our concept of time more resembles the cyclical view—though not in its strictest sense—than the linear.

Holidays as Seasons

If you live in a climate that exhibits few significant seasonal changes, then you are missing out on one of life's most delightful experiences. There is nothing more enchanting than the buds of springtime working their magic to restore the trees to life, the first morning when you open your window and hear birds singing, the variegated leaves of autumn, or a silent snowfall.

In a society that moves from home to car to office and back again—each with its own background music—we barely feel the impact of the shifts in seasons. The pace is too fast. The music too loud. The loss, well, incalculable.

If, however, you make the effort to take an occasional walk and feel the moods of the seasons then, your life is so much the richer. But beyond the sheer beauty you also know that each season has a distinct feel. A resonance that your psyche responds to. There is something special in the air in springtime. And yes, in the fall it's there too—all together different, but no less enchanting.

So it is with the holidays. More than once the annual cycle of the Jewish year has been dubbed "seasons of the soul." Each spring we pack away our layers of sweaters and dust the winter's dormancy off our bicycle seats. We're free again. Just like we were last spring, only not quite.

Each year Passover comes. We pack away the bread products and dust off those grape juice–stained haggadahs. In Hebrew, Passover is labeled Z'man Heruteynu—the time of our freedom. We're free again. Just like we were last Passover, only not quite.

Seasons as Opportunities

Every holiday has its own personality, its own feel. There is a singular opportunity for personal growth that exists within the observance of each holiday that is present at no other time during the year.

Passover is called the time of our freedom because at that time we can comprehend and actualize personal freedom in a way that cannot be achieved at any other time during the year. It's in the air, ripe for the picking. The same is true of the festival of Succos, which bears the title—the time of our joy. If you want to understand what joy is and successfully deal with the inner conflicts that inhibit its expression, then you've got to live in a succah for a week. On Succos, the door to the candy store has been left wide open. Whoever wants to can come in and help themselves. Joy is an idea, a state of mind and a challenge. Joy is a tool for living, and on Succos it's there to be better understood and more fully integrated into the fabric of your being.

Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur

If you've been to Paris but you missed the Louvre, then you haven't been to Paris. If you participate in a Jewish holiday and you're not different as a result, if you haven't grown, then you have missed the whole point of the holiday.

Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, like all Jewish holidays, are enormous opportunities for personal growth. There is almost no limit to what you can achieve on these days.

It is no wonder that the month of Elul, the month before Rosh Hashanah, is viewed as a month of preparation for the days of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. The quality of any trip will in large part be a reflection of the preparation put in ahead of time. So it is with the High Holidays, these days of awe—of awesome opportunity for insight and growth.

This is the purpose of the Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur Survival Kit. It has been written to give you an appreciation of what can be accomplished on these days. Admittedly it only begins to scratch the surface. But you must know—even this surface is so fertile, so rich in possibilities for growing, for becoming a more fully developed human being and Jew—that years can be spent harvesting the bounty of this spiritual topsoil. Beneath it lie riches beyond our wildest dreams.

Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are a personal odyssey. The machzor—the High Holiday prayer book—serves as the primary guide for this odyssey, and though it is extensively detailed, it outlines only the most important landmarks. Each of these landmarks resides within each and every one of us. They come in the form of questions that ask us what we want to achieve with our lives, as statements of values that give us cause to stop and reflect or as bits of spiritual inspiration. They ask us to rethink our inner lives and the implications of the choices we have made. Each prayer, each internal landmark, calls us away from the stagnation that the routine of life breeds and urges us to reassert our determination that life will always be an exciting quest for understanding and personal development.

There is something enthralling about watching children traverse the path of discovery and growth. However, as the years pass and the less children seem to grow and develop, the less attention we adults pay them. But the thrill of growth doesn't end when we reach voting age. For mature, sensitive, thinking adults, Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur contain the tools that will help ensure that our lives continue to blossom and develop long after our shoe sizes reach their outer limits.

A Word about Judaism

Judaism makes demands. It is anything but a religion of comfort. The Shulchan Aruch (the code for Jewish living) opens with the statement that, in the morning a person should rise with the vitality of a lion.

Let's be honest. When was the last time you felt like a lion in the morning—ready to attack the new day with every ounce of vitality you possessed?

How precious they are, so rarified, those moments when we feel that there is nothing we would rather do than confront life and its challenges head-on. More likely, if you're like most of us, your first impulse upon awakening in the morning is to hit that beloved snooze button and roll over for another twenty minutes of dream-filled bliss.

Together, Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are the dawning moments of a new year. They are 365 mornings all rolled into three days of directed energy. If you feel like rolling over and going back to sleep (after all, you've been through these holidays before), I beg of you, don't. These three days, like Judaism and Jewish life itself, call us to transcend our first inclinations and to strive for a greatness we so long to achieve but are so hesitant to pursue. Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, like life, will take a great deal of effort, perhaps even some pain.

But isn't that what you will teach your children? That the pursuit of comfort is the antithesis of the search for excellence? That if you want to achieve anything of enduring value in life, it will take great determination and effort?

Do your ears hear what your lips speak? The truth about life is so very plain. The challenges—and the rewards—so incredibly enormous. If only we could get out of bed.

Here then is the Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur Survival Kit. Its aim is far more than its title—survival. It is my hope that with the help of this book you will not only survive your experience in synagogue this year but also emerge from the holidays with a new appreciation for the thrilling challenge called life.
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